It's all relative

Now this may have gone straight over the head of any non-Dutch person reading this blog (and some Dutchmen as well), but for the past week, our country has been in the grips of an avalanche that hit Prince Friso, the brother of our crown prince, last Friday. He has been comatose since. Today, the news was brought out that he has severe brain damage and may never become conscious again. In the media, it is said that everybody's hearts go out to the Royal Family, that we are all thinking of them and supporting them in our minds. On the other hand, there are lots of people saying that there is too much attention being paid to this story (there were news updates every hour, in which they mainly said that the situation hadn't changed and that there was no news), and that people are being hypocrites because there are people dying every day, most notably in Syria, doing far more dangerous things than skiing, without receiving any attention at all.
Now today on a popular talk show, someone said that she was horrified by the second type of reaction. "Is it too much to ask to show some sympathy for another person? Have we become this cold-hearted that we just do not care about another man's suffering anymore?" she asked. As I was one of those who thought that this story was spread out way too thick, I was very surprised by this response. Of course, there must be some for whom it is very difficult to imagine what Friso's family is going through now, or who think "ah, he's rich, they'll put him in a nice hospital whereas I wouldn't get anything in the same situation". There may even be those who are secretly jealous of all the attention this comatose man is getting. But for me, the main problem with all this attention is that it is stuff I do not need to know, stuff I do not want to know, and quite frankly, stuff I am embarrassed to know. This is the personal affair of the patient, his family, and his doctors. Why do we need to see images on the news every day of his mother, our Queen, going to visit him? Why can't she do that in private? Why do we need to know exactly how much brain damage there is, and how big the chance is that he will remain a vegetable for the rest of his life? Why do we need to know which rehabilitation centre is most likely to "get him"? These are all things that do not concern us in the least, but are the private concerns of his immediate family.
So there, it is not that I have become that cold-hearted not to care anymore, on the contrary, I cannot even begin to comprehend how terrible this situation must be for his wife, mother, brothers, and children. But I do not need to know any more. He may be a Famous Person, he is still a person, and I think he has the right to suffer in silence.

Strangely enough, at the same time there was a big debate about a "reality" hospital tv series that had been filming people in the ER without asking for their permission (or having that permission asked by a person in a white coat, implying that it was a doctor. I mean, if you've just had an accident, and you're completely disoriented, and a doctor-like person asks you if you agree to something, you damn well will, or you'll be afraid they won't help you), which is a breach of privacy laws. The hospital was shocked by the bad publicity this has caused, and pulled the program, to the disappointment of the makers. Applause all around, see how "the public" has shown "the greedy voyeuristic programme makers" how it's done.

Now really, if we put those two things side by side, aren't we all being a bit hypocritical here? It's okay to show and tell every last bit of brain tissue damage on one person, but it's a big deal if on another channel you can see a man who has broken his leg while falling from the stairs flirting with one of the nurses? To me, it feels as if everybody is trying to be as politically correct about both events as they possibly can, sometimes going a bit too far in this. Really, it's all relative, and to me, the less I have to see, know, or hear about other people's private concerns, the better.